de Combo, noiembrie 14, 2013
56

BASIC COURSE OF MEDICINE
in Dramaland


For the ones who recently discovered the amazing world of dramas, but also for the most expert drama-addicted, this could be useful: a basic course to know how to steer through the various causes, effects and cures of the most recurrent illnesses of Dramaland.

After this course, the dynamics of health in dramas will have no more secrets for you, and you'll be able to answer the questions: How? When? And above all, Why diseases occur?

Lesson 1: Gastrointestinal Disorders
This disease occurs in 36% of dramas, essentially to make viewers laugh.
Constipation, vomiting, diarrhea, colitis, hemorrhoids… It's not really important what the problem is. What is important is that the character presents us some hilarious scenes set in the bathroom.

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Causes may or may not be specified. Sometimes the problem is some spoiled food, other times it’s simply about a predisposition of the subject to certain disorders.

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Prevention in certain cases could be possible, characters should just:
  • Pay attention to food’s quality
  • Increase the amount of fiber they eat
  • Do not take random medicines that may mess up their bowels.
Treatment includes medicines that are easily available, although sometimes there may be difficulties to request them from the pharmacist who, cynically, lacks discretion and forces characters to a public declaration of their intestinal situation.

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Lesson 2: Amnesia
In 42% of dramas at least one of the main characters at some point of the story suffer from amnesia. Such illness intervenes in the plot when everything's going too well, just to mess things up.

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There are two causes, and consequently types, of amnesia: the one caused by a head trauma and the one due to a traumatic event. Regarding the first type, variants are numerous: from drowning to brain surgery, from a blow on the head to car accidents. As for the second case, the person unconsciously removes from his/her memory a period or a particular moment of his/her life that caused him/her a major shock.

The severity of the loss of memory is variable, especially for the first kind of amnesia. In the best case, our hero will just forget about a single person or a small part of his life.  In the worst case, he will forget everything about himself, his life and sometimes he’ll lose even the skills learned during his life.

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However, the situation is always very severe, especially because there’s no specific medicine to cure amnesia. Therefore, those who are closest to the patient will do everything possible to make him remember what he has forgotten. But while he feels forced to remember usually he will make no improvement. In fact, it’s always an unscheduled déjà vu that leads our hero to regain his memory.

Anyway, don’t worry, even when the situation seems to be drastic and you’re about to lose hope, LOVE will eventually fix everything. In fact, of all cases of amnesia encountered in dramas 100% is perfectly cured, in the end.

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Lesson 3: Cold

This disease is found in 53% of dramas. Usually, it intervenes in order to show the protagonists' mutual feelings and to give us some corny scenes.


Symptoms that distinguish it are fever, cough and nasal congestion, but what makes it recognizable in the initial state is, usually, a faint.

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Symptoms recognized, do not rack your brain to find out the causes: that it is viral is out of the question and cases of transmission are almost equally scarce. The reason why people catch a cold in Dramaland is always and only one: the weather. Normally our hero has been standing for hours in the cold, under the rain and in the bad weather, in order to do something for his beloved one or simply to wait for her at a date where she's not going to come (or vice versa). Cold weather, tiredness and fatigue inevitably lead to catching a cold.

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It’s clear that, in such cases, we cannot speak of prevention since we can’t persuade a lover to desist from waiting for his beloved. Moreover, remember that, in these kinds of situations, it’s impossible to call the person you are waiting for (the phone is out of battery, it’s been left somewhere else, there’s no line, or you simply can’t make a call because of your pride or... whatever!), so our hero is forced to stay in the anguish of waiting until she finally arrives or his body can no longer stand.

So let’s move to the cures.

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For men simply a night of rest (preferably next to their loved one), can be enough to fully recover from every illness. Common medicines are optional, what is important is to be extremely careful about what the sick person eats. Here, things get a little more complicated, in fact, it seems that in every drama people go in search of the most effective "home remedy". There are some who rely on citrus, some on traditional soups, and others prepare various concoctions.

In short, the range of choices is wide and conditioned by knowledge and personal tastes of the person who prepares the food. However, everything is of relative importance, because in any case what will actually heal the sick is only and solely one thing: lots and lots of LOVE <3.


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